OMG! @093&?%993!!!!!!!!!!!!

Woooooooo!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is all.

ADDENDUM: Seriously. HAPPY WOO WOO NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!

(For your sake, I hope I don't do this all night -- but I might. I smoke up here in my office, 'cause it's got the sucking fan thing and all, so every thirty minutes or so, I take a smoke break, which, I'm sure, irritates my guests, because, God knows, a minute without Ms. Lori is a minute in eternity, but hey, it's better than blowing puffs of doom in their faces and stuff and things, sooo...

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! 2007! And shit! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!


SOBER ADDENDUM, 8:00 a.m., January 1, 2007: Hmmm. Apparently, I was bombed out of my gourd last night, and I don't even know what "gourd" means, or whereabouts on my person a gourd might possibly exist, but there you have it.

A couple of interesting observations:
1) I did not, in fact, take a smoke break every thirty minutes, as exhibit A will show. I present to the jury this ashtray with no more than ten butts in it, the sum of the entire day's worth of smoking.

2) I'm positive that my guests never have felt nor ever will feel that "a minute without Ms. Lori is a minute in eternity."

3) Taking into the account the above statements, I can safely surmise that I am an egotistical liar while under the influence of cheap beer and greasy finger food.