A Buttful of Blogs!

So I joined this thing the other day, and true to its promise, I have received many new visitors here at OWM -- thing is, most of those visitors are just passing acquaintances, not long term lovers. Get what I'm saying? They surf out as quickly as they surf in, and really, I'm glad of this -- based on the blogs I've visited thus far, I'd estimate 80% of those who leave quickly are:

A) Religious-faaaar-right Republicans.

B) Sixteen year olds hankering for some boobies.

C) Old ladies hankering for some knitting talk.

D) Old men hankering for some boobies.

E) African-Americans who believe the Democratic party is akin to the KKK.(???!!!)

F) Young ladies hankering for some knitting talk.

G) Overwhelmed stay-at-home mommies hankering for some X (I kid).

H) Named Billy-Jack or Susie-Peggy -- and they like their guns, garsh durnit.

I) Incredibly intelligent boys from India who write astonishingly well, but love their aunties way too much.

J) Witches.

K) Poets who write astonishingly bad poetry.

L) Dog people (nothing wrong with dogs, but I can do without the blogs written in "dog voice").

M) Fiction writers who write astonishingly bad fiction.

N) Astonishingly bad writers.

0) Astonished people.

P) Crafty folk. Like dried flowers and hot glue gun crafty folk. Or empty milk jug and tin can crafty folk. Make angels out of old pantyhose crafty folk. Dreamcatchers out of old chicken bones crafty folk.

Q) Anti-feminists.

R) Girls who believe themselves possessed of the darkest soul on earth.

S) Proud owners of...whatever. They are very, very, very proud, and their blogs reflect that.

T) Boys who believe themselves possessed of the most tender soul on earth.

U) Grown women who are disturbingly little-girlish -- their blog skins are always pink and sparkly, like their lips.

V) Grown men who collect McDonald's Happy Meal toys.

W) White, wealthy, male, and apparently so.

X) Lollies, as in "LOL" people. They laugh and laugh and laugh, and they must die.

Y) Science Fiction geeks who believe William Shatner is their real father.

Z) Cereal eaters who watch the weather, as in "Today I ate some Cheerios while I watched the rain plonk against my kitchen window." Or “Yesterday was fun. I ate a bowl of Corn Flakes -- with sugar! -- while I watched the snow drift down from heaven.”



Amen.



But, despite all of that, I have discovered quite a few interesting, engaging, delicious, naughty, bold, intelligent blogs, so I guess this isn’t such a bad thing after all.