"But Shit, Woman, it is Cold as Fuck Up Here"

I don’t suppose it’s a coincidence that just when I was about to post today about the hilarious, politically incorrect and brilliantly executed Old Negro Space Program mockumentary, I decided to check my e-mail first and discovered this from someone calling her/himself "peaceofmind":

“It is obvious that you are jealous of Patti LaBelle. I read your
post about the Nobel Peace Prize concert. You completely misinterpreted what was going on. I will not waste any more of my time on you. But as a Patti LaBelle fan I say grow up.”

Then, this one from someone called "madbee" that said simply:

"Racist asshole!"

Both from AOL accounts.

Well, I don’t think I’m jealous of Ms. LaBelle -- suppose it’s possible. I mean, anything’s possible, right? Why, they finally caught the ol’ chupacabra, didn’t they? Most thought that an impossible task, so hell, maybe I am jealous and I just can’t face it at this point in time. Perhaps when I grow up, become a real woman with elaborate head dressings of my own, I will seriously contemplate my sick jealousy with a clinical, lash-fluttering eye.

Until that glorious day, a day I don’t anticipate breaking until the year 2035, I shall remain blissfully ignorant whilst posting inappropriate things about folks I am subconsciously jealous of.

And holy crackers, before I receive e-mails from outraged African-American individuals of a certain age, I will admit here and now, to all the world and its children, that it is possible I am pathologically jealous of old negroes, and I will do my best to correct this serious personality flaw when I finally do grow up.